oh hey there

how our tastes have changed. childhood sweethearts, basketball, hot sweaty afternoons. your feet on mine, we drew on swimming pool tiles. teenagedom engulfed us, all these nights we spent dancing, grinding, adrinkin’, led us to a field where flowers bloomed. crashing cars, winks and clinks, hormones aragin’. you held my gaze, touched my heart. first break, first loss. amended and strong again, crossed the world and landed in the city of lights. good times as we rolled by the northern towns, abercrombie and fitch goodness. so young, so innocent. as we basked in the sun on our picnic blanket, drinking that bottle of french wine, stroking and smiling, woke up to find a dream of a summer. all these hungry minds, longing to make a difference. you taught me twain, you taught me strings. sparks of inspiration, strayed across the line. when you returned, innocence got caught and released. kiss. kiss. more kiss. we left this continent. but i found a buzz, holding my hand, sleeping next to me on rainy weekends. another bridge awaited us, except it got burned. lost and confused, travels renewed spirits. chicken soup for the soul appeared, too much chemistry between us. waterfalling and eurotripping, new discoveries of the body were made. as sensuality peaked, fortune arrived. a season of the orient, full of substance. yet time didn’t buy us more time, and another era rang us. through the hazy smoke, we found each other. we created a magical space. then the vodka fueled nights followed, one slow year. wait – is it now? older passerby’s, younger distractions, so much attraction boiling within us. the days of youth beckon, ushering another age of experiments. energy splurging out of this pot, once again, i embark on brand new adventures. doing it like it’s 2011, when the pages were blank, and endless flow of ink to write these stories. to have a ball. and ultimately, to rediscover our sexuality. through these sparkling eyes. through our malleable reality.

 

oh hey there.

 

university years

at last.

sweet glory.

the ultimate achievement arrived in a tangible form.

freshers everywhere, excited and way too eager for their own good.

but now, the state of mind lies in the heartland of Autos.

where the aryans reside and where the heart lies in illusion.

 

annoyed vibrations in the air, wafting like retarded bears.

uncertainty and poor timing. how naive, small children.

the unbearable heaviness of un-being ran its course.

winter came and the cold couldn’t get any colder.

 

broken shards pierced through the mirror, falling falling falling.

so sharp that cuts were inflicted on the bruised skin.

pain is a sensation. but pain is also power.

the power of regeneration. rebirth.

like a phoenix rising from the ashes.

a myriad of delights appeared. a season of opportunities.

seized and lived out to its pinnacle.

19 years, and europe became the playground.

the platform for many more adventures to come.

but the soul longs for spiritual reckoning.

figures that matter entered to prove its existence.

so memorable, yet so unrequited.

but that is precisely why it will always have a spot deep down inside.

 

*

 

filled with newfound wisdom and memories of profound beauty,

two decades found its place amongst the academics and athletes.

thus the year began with work in the company of friendships.

reinforced with strong ties amidst all the movement.

a bed that stayed was made as the dragons took over.

the rabbit hopped off and never looked back.

a crab came by and slipped away in the sand.

other interests occupied the mind, more occurrences took up the space of life.

beliefs were strengthened and suddenly, the cupid poured his elixir.

smooth and delicious, a summer of companionship.

exchange of cultures became a trend,

and we are still in round one.

oh, if only we’d known what was next in store.

 

*

 

everything happened so fast. a blink of an eye.

start. pause. rewind. pause.

fantasies are realities. reality is fantasy.

throw thyself into an absolutely new world.

enter the realms of mitteleuropa.

remnants of harvy ’09.

remnants of the year of teenage delinquency.

remnants of canadian days.

where we tasted our first liquor, our first herbs – our first rebellion.

where we felt invincible. immortal.

these memories are real. so real that it hurts, but only in the finest way.

because they remind you that you are alive and the path is so malleable.

and once we left that era, we find reality staring at us in the face again.

but this time, its dreamlike quality had dissipated,

contained in a jar that we put on our windowsills.

to keep us warm through the foreign nights.

perhaps these nights only seemed foreign because the soul refused to leave its beloved premise.
the moment it caught up with the presence, the dark clouds turned into a violent rain,
the skies cleared up and the sun was found shining brightly as if for the first time.
smiles in piles, grand adventures returned.
wilder than ever.
new characters formed new plot lines and lived another era.
one that is so different and unique, distinctive in taste.
which one cannot wash away.
it stained like red wine accidents, ferraris bent and fired up.
so many lessons learned, so many moments to treasure.

*

last note: i wouldn’t have done it any other way.

 

beat

i walk, you walk, we walk.

your vibration sliding past mine,

from caged seats to running dogs.

traveling is a state of mind.

living is a state of mind.

privileged as fuck.

safety net beneath our soiled feet.

what is left?

 

*

 

butterfly.

fluttering.

crouch.

pounce.

tears relieve us from the harsh climate.

wash away our perceived sins.

clear blue sky awaits us once again.

 

these absurd dreams haunt and chase.

palette of rainbows splurged across the case,

melting away in the humid air.

abandonment, leave me alone.

these little fear flies eat you away.

rot me not, for i will love.

with honesty.

generosity.

kindness.

and compassion.

 

caution is not my strongest suit,

frivolity flares up from time to time.

fallen from grace, was it meant to be?

ephemerally blissful, our only moment is now.

reality composed of nows,

nostalgic melancholia shadowing quiet moments.

tonight i would like to sleep.

 

sleep.

and dream of our sweet scents.

trailing behind tracks covered with snow,

and smokes wafting by the platform.

 

happiness americana

revved up engine.

on the road once again.

baked beans in mouth, gates opened and ski trip kids ran.

fat boy slim talks of farm business, everybody’s sleeping on their own headrests.

along came the conductor, pouring his passionate heart out,

about his garden, his bourbon and his throttle.

friendly faces appeared, chilli dog was ordered along with raging bitches.

saved by the wind, markets apassin’, we were jumpin’.

navigating through the world’s narrowest bookshop to capitol hill wanderings.

georgetown welcomed us with open arms, everyone wearing runners.

the long weekend took them home then took us to a real maryland home.

food brought upon the table, we speak of our hometown.

reminiscence of bygone days seemed to be our past time.

hidden lounges swooped us away for a quick second,

rolling and dancing to the brits, salute!

the sahara noticed us sparkling marbles, exchanges were greeted amicably.

and now, the trains pulled into the station,

awaiting us to board the mothership.

oh yes, darling, you’re too pretty to smoke.

oh no, boy, one minute left.

get up to your seat.

yay man. yemen.

little buns and hooded jackets were treasured,

as i recount the story of my sahlab,

before dozing off to camus…

 

*

 

time to head to the dining cart.

sierra nevada clinks, 8 o’clock dinner.

steak and fine conversations, we closed down the premise of neighbourliness.

as we moved to the next cart, whisky in hand,

your body moving close to mine,

we caught a glimpse of something divine.

smoke stop at pitts, listening to the melody of infinite moment,

let’s not ruin it by snapping it.

goodbye for now, chicago awaits.

sisters reunited, down for a tour around this concrete jungle.

lights and jazz, belmont and speakeasy,

coconut latte with cardamom and rose water,

piers and snowflakes, intertwined with each other.

oh, didn’t we have a blast roaming around this city.

bilbao meets borneo, we jumped onto this bus,

going somewhere, going anywhere.

chinatowns and subway lines, musicians busking their talents.

pay some attention, citizens of gotham.

the jewels spread on these dirty floors, nobody bothered.

pick one up and marvel.

marvel.

at the winsomeness.

at the harmonious structure.

amidst the chaos.

 

*

 

hold the phone, this chapter ain’t over.

moma invited us for a strange japanese film,

new york times buddies caught up in midtown.

along with smiles and hot dogs,

rooftop bars and authentic ramen.

brooklyn felt generous and an attic comforted us.

delicious affairs, sunny days encapsulated our essence,

writers hang out in bars, unfold this red carpet.

for us to spread sunflowers, lobsters and green fairies.

hell’s kitchen rhythms, the kgb located us.

smokes went up into thin air, pounding on the table,

fries and ceviche, new friends to be made.

after a day of strolling, it’s time to be back on the other side.

these sights are so blissful, how i wish to stay.

empty flight, polish girl sleeping behind me.

and i couldn’t help but wonder,

what is life, if not a fantasy?

 

*

 

what are you looking for?

those rare moments of inspiration. infinite moment.

did we make a wish when we saw the shooting stars?

aren’t these moments priceless?

you and i, laughing, crying,

every single human emotion jumbled into one.

one big fat joke.

a joke, a real joke, touches you deep down.

and if we’re lucky enough to be humorous,

well then… we’ve won the jackpot.

 

at the end of the day, we’re all a little dysfunctional.

love someone’s flaws.

see the beauty in their blatant ugliness.

do not feel dampened when you’re not understood.

strive to understand instead.

 

as my cabbie said, only your perception matters.

verdad.

 

Discover, Engage, Inspire. Freelance journalist who produce films//On a trek, in search of untold stories.