November 1, 2017 69 By Maggie Tan

the shadows beneath your toes,

linger behind convulsions of space-time oddities.

you are muttering nonsense, how is it possible this used to be an entity?

are you still the same you five years ago?

preoccupied with the finesse of the body,

craving to be an independent individual.

skip a few stones, a few miles,

we now stand here looking inward,

to fiddle with a shadow,

who knew no bounds and had only just begun to embark on a journey.


a journey into the wilderness,

buckthorn filled forests and swooping eagles,

abandoning the certainty of societal demands.

armed with kindred spirits and teachers of the best sort,

leaving you alone to explore,

and make up your own mind.

these shadows are peculiar to encounter again,

because you amended your book so many times since then.

after all the fights and tears,

explosives traded in for ammunitions of wisdom instead.


you reminded me again of my quest,

a lonely quest, a desire to seek a different version of reality.

one that is full of possibilities, generosity…

a mixed salad of carnal predispositions,

ecstatic lust for adventures,

a dash of lulling idleness upon the end of the script,

momentarily lost for words

writers block then unblocked –


with a renewed sense of purpose, unwilling to conform, unwilling to settle, too proud to say yes, too narrow-minded to say no, always looking for alternatives, to the current narrative.




a phoenix does not rise out of complacence and status-quo.

its feathers thrive on the destruction of the old structure,

flaming red amidst a complete annihilation.

we shouldn’t be afraid to dissolve.

we should pick up the ashes and put them in a jar.

spread them over the places of hurt, the pockets of abandonment, the holes of missed chances, the folds of our imperfections.


drawn throughout this en-tire continuum,

are the crayon marks of your voluptuous being.

your integrity is intact.

you are no longer ashamed.

you face your reality truthfully.

you give the benefit of the doubt.

you mean what you say. you strut.

on the catwalk with confidence, and you let others join you in your struts.




it has been a while. update this book, tend to the gardens of your inner contradictions. zooooooooom out. breathe. all will be well.

we are minute stardust, at once so small and large, pixelated and frozen in a continuously and simultaneously expanding sphere.

hold those around you in this chapter tight.

hold them ever so fuckingly tight.

in five years time, you will once again express your disbelief.

at how transient everything is.

at how forgivable everything is.


this is the unbearable lightness of being.